Archbishop's web site Denver Catholic Register Parishes Catholic Pastoral Center
November 28, 2001
Damen House offers homeless women, children hope
Long-term shelter equips mothers with skills to start over
By Roxanne King
Nine years ago this month, Tina Duncan, then 30, had just spent $10,000 in three months on drugs and alcohol. Recently separated from her husband, the mother of three children, then 3, 4 and 5, knew her life had spiraled out of control.
Duncan's parents and siblings intervened and she willingly spent 30 days in a rehabilitation program.
"When I got out of Arapahoe House, I had no control over my children, no control over my life," she told some 30 gathered for a Nov. 17 luncheon to benefit Damen House, a shelter for homeless and battered women with children.
"I couldn't make my own decisions," Duncan continued. "I was scared to death. I was scared to talk to people. My self-esteem was extremely low."
Her mother, who had cared for Duncan's children while she was in treatment, was also re-parenting her. Duncan wanted to change, but didn't know where to start. The cradle Catholic decided she needed to go to confession.
Duncan went to her home parish, Spirit of Christ in Arvada, and poured her heart out to a deacon, who gently told her that she had to confess to a priest — which she did.
"The priest got the short version," Duncan said to laughter.
Recognizing that Duncan needed help to become independent, Deacon Mike Howard gave her the number to Damen House.
Now 38, the petite office manager with cascading curls said Damen House gave her the stability and skills she needed to start over.
"They taught me how to take control of my life again, how to feel better about myself, how to take care of my kids," Duncan said.
She took parenting and self-esteem classes; she learned how to budget her money. She went to Alcoholics Anonymous. After four months, Damen House helped her get into transitional housing. She went back to school and got training as a dental assistant.
Today, Duncan manages a dental office and has her own home. Her ex-husband sobered up a year after she did and the two share custody of their children, now growing teens. Wanting to give back to the organization that helped her, Duncan worked several years as a volunteer at Damen House. She now serves as a part-time night manager for the home. Her mother, too, equally grateful, also works at the shelter.
"I'll be indebted forever to them," Duncan said.
Donna Baiocco, Damen House director and program developer, said the home provided stability and shelter, but Duncan "did the work" to become self-sufficient.
"If people really want to change their lives, Damen House is there," she said.
A safehouse and homeless shelter for women and children since 1992, Damen House took in its 200th family this month, Baiocco said.
"We have 199 other stories to tell," she said with a smile.
Operated by the Sisters of St. Francis of Penance and Christian Charity, better known as the Marycrest Sisters, the home traces its roots to 1965, when the sisters opened their convent to those left homeless by the Platte River flood. In the 70s, they took in men recently released from prison. In 1987, they switched gears and began serving homeless single women and displaced homemakers. Five years later, when a study revealed that the largest segment of Denver's homeless population were children under 5, they shifted from providing emergency shelter to offering long-term transitional housing for women and children.
Their goal is to help displaced women become self-sufficient and to help children overcome the effects of abuse and homelessness, Baiocco said during a visit to the stately, comfortable home two weeks ago. The program addresses the root causes of homelessness by offering a safe place to live, case management and recovery classes. Additionally, each woman is required to get job training, work, go to school or get substance abuse treatment.
The average stay is five months, Baiocco said. The longest stay was two years, she added. The home can accommodate up to 30 people. Right now, it is at capacity, Baiocco said, serving 8 families with a total of 18 children.
The program also offers a two-year follow up program, which can be extended if necessary. Some 20 families are in the follow-up program, Baiocco said.
The program is remarkably successful: Ninety-five percent of those in follow-up last year were in their own apartments or homes and over 60 percent of the women were working, with another 20 percent in school.
Discovering that the greatest obstacle to women seeking self-sufficiency was affordable day care, the home opened up a childcare facility in January available to the mothers at the home and in the follow-up program, Baiocco said. It can serve up to 13 children from infants to pre-school.
With an annual operating budget of $400,000 funded predominately from grants, the home is seeking to increase its individual donors, the director said.
"Studies show that the most successful nonprofits get the bulk of their funding from individuals," Baiocco said.
To help with that, the home started an auxiliary, Friends of Damen House, on Mother's Day. The luncheon Duncan addressed was the second event the auxiliary sponsored.
Becoming an auxiliary member is an easy way to help the home provide for women who are struggling to help themselves, said Mary Cessar, an auxiliary organizer. While the auxiliary's long-term goal is to increase the individual donor base, it also provides cash for immediate needs.
"We want to be able to help support Damen House," Cessar said. "When circumstances and special needs come up, we want to be able to give Donna a check. For example, Christmas: We want to be able to help the kids have something extra for Christmas."
Cost to join the auxiliary is $35 per person, $70 a couple.
At an early Thanksgiving dinner Nov. 19, former residents told the Register about the difference the home has made in their lives.
"It's one of the best things that's happened to me," said Julia Cornwell, 24, who arrived at the home pregnant and homeless April 2000 and left 10 months later.
"They helped me learn to save my money and become responsible," the single-parent of a 1-year-old said. Cornwell said she makes better choices now, is training to become a Montessori teacher and is in her own place.
"I just want to say `thanks' to them," Cornwell said.
Marcey Price, 33, had left an abusive relationship and had just finished treatment for drugs and alcohol when she entered Damen House eight months ago.
"I didn't know what I was going to do," the single-parent of three children said. "If I didn't have Damen House I'd probably be homeless."
Instead, with strengthened parenting skills and renewed confidence in herself, Price is scheduled to move into subsidized housing Dec. 1 and is enrolled for spring semester at a community college.
"It's basically meant my life," Price said describing what the shelter has meant to her. With her eyes welling, she added, "If I didn't have Damen House my kids probably wouldn't be with me because I wouldn't have them on the streets."
Duncan, too, testified that Damen House changes lives.
"I was able to become Tina the person, not Tina the addict or Tina the alcoholic," she said. "I like the life I have today."
For more information on Damen House or the auxiliary, call Donna Baiocco at 303-433-4280.
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